MOVING YOUR MARRIAGE FROM THE ROCKS TO THE ROCK SERIES 004 – A COVENANT RELATONSHIP
MARRIAGE A COVENANT RELATIONSHIP
LESSON OBJECTIVES :
Understand the power of a covenant in the spiritual realm
The marriage covenant means accepting God’s purpose for your marriage.
The marriage covenant means receiving your mate as a gift from God for your growth and perfection
The marriage covenant means “ leaving and cleaving”.
The marriage covenant means you allow nothing to divide or break the marriage
PROTECTING THE MARRIAGE COVENANT
QUESTION : What is a Covenant?
It is a binding and solemn agreement made by two or more individuals to do something.
A signed written agreement between two or more parties (nations) to perform some action.
An agreement between God and his people in which God makes certain promises and requires certain behaviour from them in return.
In relation to God, it is the promises of God to man as found in the Bible.
In a marriage , it is a binding commitment to each other to love each other to love each other and to remain together until one dies.
VARIOUS TYPES OF COVENANTS
Between God and Man
Our salvation is based on the covenant of God with man through Jesus (Heb 9:15).
Other Covenants God made with man include the Noahic covenant (Genesis 8:20 – 9:17), the Abrahamic covenant(Genesis 17:1 – 11), the Mosaic covenant( Genesis 19 -24:18) , the Davidic covenant(1 Chronicles 17:11 – 14) and the new covenant through Christ Jesus.
God will keep His covenant no matter what the circumstances (Is 54:10).
God enables man to keep the covenant ( 2 Cor 3:4 – 6)
Between man and man
They were to bind men together
Example of David and Jonathan (1 Sam 18 : 1-4)
Between husband and wife (Mal 2:14 – 15)
LIVING GOD’S PURPOSE FOR YOUR MARRIAGE
Provide an atmosphere of love and security. Ephesians 5:28 – 29 “In the same way , husbands ought to love their wives as they love their bodies. For a man who loves his wife actually shows love for himself. No one hates his own body but feeds and cares for it, just as Christ cares for the Church.
Teaches us to be servants Ephesians 5:22 “For wives, this means submit to your husbands as to the Lord.” – Both parties must submit to each other for the success of the marriage.
Helps us learn to share and give
Produce godly offspring
Become the building block of the Church and Society
SELFISH PURPOSES FOR GETTING INTO MARRIAGE
To obtain financial security.
To get away from parental authority
To feel important
To merely satisfy sexual lust
RECEIVING YOUR MATE
Adam received Eve as a Gift from God (Gen 2:18 – 23) “Then the Lord God said, “It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper who is just right for him.” So the Lord God formed from the ground all the birds of the sky. He brought them to the man to see what he would call them, and the man chose a name for each one. He gave names to all the livestock, all the birds of the sky, and all the wild animals. But still there was no helper just for him. So the Lord God caused the man to fall into a deep sleep. While the man slept, the lord God took out one of the man’s ribs and closed up the opening. Then the lord God made a woman from the rib, and he brought her to the man. “ At last !” the man exclaimed. “This one is bone from my flesh! She will be called ‘woman’ because she was taken from ‘man’.
How to Receive your mate
Accept your mate with his/her flaws. None of Us is perfect. You are NOT perfect yourself. In fact the marriage is God’s tool to perfect both of You.
Realize the basis of acceptance is trust in God. Trust is the ‘glue’ that holds the marriage together.
Do not try to change your mate into your ‘image’. Listen, “You can’t change your spouse, only God can.”
Do not compare your mate with others.
Do not criticize your mate
Be more sensitive to your mate’s needs than your own.
“LEAVING AND CLEAVING” ( GEN 2:24 – 25)
“This explains why a man leaves his father and mother and is joined to his father and mother and is joined to his wife, and the two are united into one. Now the man and his wife were both naked, but they felt no shame.
Leaving means the relationship with the parents is changed.
You are still to honour your father and mother, but are not under obligation to obey them.
You are not to abandon your parents. (1 Tim 5:8) “But those who won’t care for their own household, have denied the true faith. Such people are worse than unbelievers”.
Leaving does not mean you are to depart from the area where your parents live or that you are not to seek their advice.
You enter into an adult relationship with your parents.
You consider your mates needs and opinions before your parents.
Your mate becomes the main person you try to please (1 Cor 7:33 -34) and not your parents.
You forgive any past hurts from your parents so you will not be bound and driven by the wounds in the future.
“Cleaving “ means to be Joined Together and Faithful to One Another.
Cleaving involves the physical , sexual union (1 Cor 6:16)
Cleaving stress the permanent bond of the marriage.
Cleaving also includes the unity emotionally and spiritually.
Adam and Eve were one before the fall (Gen 2:25)
Sin brought about man’s of himself and hindered his being transparent with his wife.
You need Jesus to make you one as a couple.
MARRIAGE THE PERMANENT SEAL
Marriage is an irrevocable, Permanent Bond (Pr 2:17)
God is a witness to the marriage union and covenant (Mal 2:14) “ You cry out, “Why doesn’t the lord accept my worship?” I’ll tell you why! Because the Lord witnessed the vows you and your wife made when you were young. But you have been unfaithful to her, though she remained your faithful partner, the wife of your marriage vows.”
Divorce between believers is wrong (1Cor 7:10 – 11) “But for those who are married, I have a command that comes not from me, but from the Lord. A wife must not leave her husband. But if she does leave him, let her remain single or else be reconciled to him. And the husband must not leave his wife.
Honor the Covenant Vows You Made to Each Other
You made an unconditional commitment to your mate, that nothing but death would separate you.
You committed to be one “flesh” with your mate.
You agreed to “cleave” only to your spouse.
You promised to fulfill your roles in the marriage.
You said you would put your mate’s needs before your own.
LET NO MAN PUT ASUNDER OR DIVIDE THE UNION – RUTH 1:16 – “Do not urge me to leave you or turn back from following you: for where you go, I will go, and where you lodge, I will lodge, Your people shall be my people, and your God, my God.